I Have a Right to Feel Good!

Just the other day, I was looking around and found my attitude... it was in the toilet. I'm tired. My back hurts. I'm worried about my daughter. The economy is tanking. This Boston weather stinks.

Man, what a spiral I was in. And for the most part, I could justify every negative aspect. "With all that's happening, I have a right to feel like crap," I thought. And I was right. So consciously, I left my attitude exactly where it was — in the toilet.

But today, I got up and tried really hard to change my attitude. Walking the dog this morning, I observed the sun coming up over the rooftops, and the long shadows in the snow covered park. "Marvelous," I thought. The air was cold and crisp. (Okay, it was 11 *&^#$% degrees.) "Wonderful," I thought.

Hey, I know it's a small start. But I have a right to feel good, too.

It's really my choice!

It Takes a Village to Raise a Martial Arts Master

To my own students at Emerald Necklace Martial Arts:

You all know I'm on the UBBT. You all think I'm crazy. But Coach Tom has just issued a challenge to YOU: keep me honest by holding me accountable. Please see the video, below.

And, thanks for helping me be better in every way!

Sensei J.

Less Is More!

Sometimes my daily meditation consists of simply laying quietly in bed for a few minutes immediately after waking up — before Ava wakes and needs to be fed, before the dog needs to be walked, before I set the day's agenda and need to get ready for work. It's quiet — as quiet as a fairly busy city street gets, anyway — and I can relax into the moment, calm my mind, and enjoy BEING. Taking time to notice simple things: the increasing light as the sun rises, the sound of rain on the roof, the dog's heavy breathing... This clears my mind of all the "stuff," and my problems and challenges suddenly get more manageable.

After finishing another pass of the Tao Te Ching last week, I decided to do more reading about Taoism: I'm now working through "365 Tao" by Deng Ming-Dao, and each meditation is a wonderful reminder to relax, accept, simplify, and reconnect to nature. Walking in the park, I notice the spring buds already coming out, without effort, and (I trust) exactly on time. There's a lesson there, to be sure!

I've been trying to simplify, too: last week I donated 3 coats I'll never wear again. There's nothing wrong with them at all, other than the clutter they were making in my closet — and my mind! I'm now looking for more stuff to get rid of!

Everything's going to be OK... with a little work!

Confession time: Last week, and so far this week, I haven't done a single pushup or crunch. I haven't run or sparred, either. I'm absolutely exhausted, and I'm taking a much needed rest. Two months ago today, my 18-month old daughter was diagnosed as having Type I diabetes. Life has been chaotic since that day: constantly monitoring blood sugar levels, checking for keytones, weighing food, counting carbs, administering insulin injections, re-thinking daycare options, careers, and more. We've been up in the middle of every night to make sure Ava's blood sugar levels are safe — Neither I nor my wife have slept for more than 5 consecutive hours in the last two months. Somehow, I've managed — mostly — to keep up with teaching, training, working, shopping, paying the bills, and all of the other things that life requires, but last week, I finally got sick and had to slow down.

Feeling better now. Not 100%, but "better". And although I don't know what tomorrow or next week will bring, the smiles on the faces of my wife and daughter this morning tell me that everything is going to be just fine. Somehow.

I've been reading a lot. It's a nice distraction from "diabetes information overload." Currently on the bookshelf: My old, dog-eared copy of the Tao Te Ching, "In Defense of Food" by Michael Pollan, and "Fist, Stick, Knife, Gun" by Geoffrey Canada. Some good self-defense lessons in each.

From the Tao Te Ching:

"Blunt your sharpness, untie your knots, soften your gaze, settle your dust."

In the midst of chaos, it's amazing what a little quiet yoga and meditation time can do for your soul.

From "In Defense of Food":

"Eat food, not too much, mostly plants."

Proper diet leads to proper health. Eating at a table and establishing mealtime rituals has been huge in reinforcing loving connections with family, especially in these stressful times.

From "Fist, Stick, Knife, Gun":

"There is no safe way to deal with the violence that our children face. The only way we are going to make a difference is to place well-trained and caring adults in the middle of what can only be called a free-fire zone in our poorest communities."

It's time to roll up our sleeves.